You’ll remember, perhaps, that the New England Patriots found themselves in hot water a handful of years ago for alleged spying on other teams’ play calls. Yesterday, ESPN (also known as “The Leader”) reported that the New Orleans Saints thought this was a good idea, in fact, well before the Patriots did.

The report from The Leader, goes like this: Saints General Manager Mickey Loomis, a man with no background in the X’s and O’s of football, set up a recording device in the visitor’s coaching box that allowed him to intercept (See what I did there???? No one has ever done that before!!!!) plays calls. It’s worth noting, with as little editorializing as possible, that Loomis, again, has no background in play calling.  In fact, former Colts General Manager Bill Polian said yesterday that he didn’t understand what the big deal was because Loomis would be unable to do anything with these play calls, assuming that he didn’t also have information about the language the Saints’ opponents used in their play calling.

The system was allegedly dismantled in 2005, during the time of Hurricane Katrina’s assault on the Gulf coast.  The NFL is investigating. This just continues what has been a long, assuredly difficult offseason for fans of the New Orleans Saints. But, hey, at least Drew Brees isn’t a free agent!  Wait, huh?

The Kansas City Royals have lost their last 11 games. The first game of the streak was on the road. The other 10? All in the friendly confines of Kauffman Stadium in Kansas City. It’s the kind of futility that would dominate sports pages.  Except…

About 1,000 miles southeast of Kansas City, a truly historic level of futility is occurring.  For many people, Saint Patrick’s Day is a joyous celebration of, well, something. For the Charlotte Bobcats, Saint Patrick’s Day was a celebration of their most recent victory, a 107-103 win over the Toronto Raptors. Since then, the Bobcats have lost 21 consecutive games. They sit at 7-57, overall. If they fail to win their last two game, against the Orlando Magic and New York Knicks, they will finish with the worst winning percentage in the history of the NBA. All under the watchful (or, more astutely, absent) eye of owner Michael Jordan. Yes, that Michael Jordan. The most competitive player the NBA has ever seen.

So rest easy, Royals fans. Things could get much worse. Just look to Charlotte.

A few years ago, the baseball glitterati deemed Derek Jeter to have come to the end of his road.  Jeter’s 2010 season slash line (Batting Average/On-Base Pct./Slugging Pct.) of .270/.340/.370 was the worst of his career. He had slowed down in the field, despite winning a Gold Glove because that awards process is so foolish. There was no power left his swing (just 10 home runs). He was, for all intents and purposes, done.

Folks inside of the Yankees clubhouse this spring said that a new Jeter had arrived. He looked younger, faster. His bat speed had increased. He looked poised. If the first 16 games of the season mean anything, those observations were spot on.  Jeter’s (admittedly very early) season slash line looks like this: .411/.436/.644. He’s already hit 10 home runs. His range factor (a fielding statistic) is the best it’s been since 2008. And the Yankees are winning. This might not be music to many people’s ears, but it’s great news to the ears of baseball fans. Amid a bevy of hot starts (Matt Kemp’s, Josh Hamilton’s) Derek Jeter has, rather quietly I might add, returned to form. If it lasts, it will be a great story. If it doesn’t, it will, at the very least, give us another reason to celebrate one of the greats of our generation.

The Nats were off yesterday. They begin a three game series with the San Diego Padres tonight in Southern California. Gio Gonzalez will take the hill for Washington. He’ll be opposed by Clayton Richard. Game time is 10:05 Eastern.

Phoenix Suns @ Utah Jazz (10:30/TNT). This game comes as the second of a doubleheader on TNT, preceded by the Boston Celtics and Miami Heat (a great game in its own right). A win for the Utah Jazz will clinch the 8^thseed in the NBA’s Western Conference. A win for the Suns would move them into a tie with Utah for the 8^th spot, leaving each team with one game remaining on their schedule and giving the Suns the tiebreak advantage. It’s as close to a must-win game as you’ll get. The Suns defeated the Jazz three weeks ago in Salt Lake City. It should be a great environment in the SLC tonight.