When I was young, I had a collection of baseball blooper videos on VHS. The videos showed players losing their cool, umpires and managers arguing, and players goofing around in the clubhouse. Yesterday was kind of like a baseball blooper VHS.

The bloopers started in Philadelphia.  Home plate umpire Bob Davidson, the genial, friendly man that he is, decided to stand in the way of Phillies Catcher Brian Schneider, as he tried to track down a passed ball. Phillies Manager Charlie Manuel, from the dugout, shouted something to Davidson about getting out of the way. Davidson then began hurling curse words at Manuel, who he ejected from the game before he could get out of the dugout.

When Manuel did step forward, the two engaged in a 3 minute, F-word filled, spittle launching competition, using each other’s faces as targets.  

Meanwhile, in Washington, Stephen Strasburg’s groin was on fire.

Strasburg struggled through 4 innings against the AAA San Diego Padres. After the game, Manager Davey Johnson explained that the issue was that Strasburg “got some Hot Stuff” where you don’t want Hot Stuff.  To keep this safe for the kids, Hot Stuff is a topical cream used to relax muscles. It is generally not used to relax the human groin. Someone or something, accidentally  or not, applied the topical cream to the nether regions of the Nationals’ ace. Strasburg, when informed that Davey spilled the beans (pun intended) stated his desire to keep the details within the confines of the locker room.

Later that night, in Toronto, Blue Jays star prospect Brett Lawrie had two atrocious strike calls go against him in the bottom of the 9^th, with the Blue Jays trailing by one run. On the first of the two strikes, Rays closer Fernando Rodney threw a pitch to Thunder Bay that was called a strike. Lawrie, thinking it was a ball, started walking to first base. Because MLB umpires never hold a grudge, when the next pitch was high and outside, home-plate umpire Bill Miller emphatically called strike 3. Lawrie, in turn, took off his helmet and threw it violently into the dirt, causing it to bounce up and strike Miller.

It will be a busy day for the MLB Discipline Czar. Of course, the umpires will never face a suspension for their unprofessionalism. That would undermine the game or something. Manuel could (but probably won’t) see a one-gamer. Lawrie may get up to 20 games (more realistically, I’d say 10). And, personally, whomever rubbed Hot Stuff on Stephen Strasburg should be suspended for the season.

The Los Angeles Kings are very good.

LeBron James is a perfect teammate. LeBron wants so badly to get his teammates involved in the offense, that he would willingly give up the opportunity to win a game on his own, instead choosing to (twice) pass the ball to a not-necessarily-open teammate. That, my friends, is value.

If you can’t tell, the Heat lost last night, due in large part to missed free throws from James and his continued reluctance to drive in an open lane, inside of 10 seconds. The Pacers won 78-75, evening the series with Miami at 1-1.

In San Antonio, the Spurs did their best LA Kings impression and dominated the LA Clippers to take a 1-0 lead in their series, shutting down Chris Paul at every possible moment.

Despite playing what amounted to a minor league lineup yesterday, the Nats were (again) unable to sweep a series, falling to the San Diego Padres 6-1.  The Nats lone run came on Bryce Harper’s second HR in as many games.  The Padres got 8 solid innings from (not) future Cy Young Award-winner Anthony Bass.

The Nats will start a new 2-game series tonight, this time with the Pittsburgh Pirates. Erik Bedard will take the hill for the folks from Western PA, while Gio Gonzalez will look to continue his Cy Young-caliber season for Washington. Game time is 7:05.

Playoff lineup:

Celtics @ 76ers (Series tied 1-1): 7:00 p.m./TNT

Lakers @ Thunder (OKC up 1-0): 9:30 p.m./TNT

Devils @ Rangers (NYR up 1-0): 8:00 p.m./NBC Sports Network